Way back in July, I published 7 Things People Need To Stop Doing On Facebook. It’s one of my most viewed – and commented on via Facebook – posts to date. Well, several months have passed, and with those months some more annoying Facebook trends have developed. I’m sure you’ve noticed. If you haven’t, then you will now, and we can be annoyed together. Then we can go buy chopsticks together and stab the armpits of the people who post this crap.
1. Sharing “If I get a million likes, my mom/wife/boyfriend/puppy will let me have____” posts.
There’s a page I like on Facebook called Checking Snopes.com before forwarding dumb emails. They did a little post about this phenomenon. They found that many of these are nothing more than “like fishing”. Think fishing for complements, only it’s for likes. Page owners do this because Facebook has this most idiotic algorithm that works like this: they show page posts to about 10% of the people who like the page if those who like it don’t add the page to a favorites list or something. To get more people to see their posts, page owners can either 1. Pay a stupid amount of money to promote the post, which then gets a tag of “sponsored”, which makes the page owner look like a pathetic d-bag, or 2. Get people to like their posts, which allows more and more people to see them. The more people like it, the more people see it, and it snowballs from there. These “million likes” posts get a lot of exposure for their page, albeit fake exposure.
2. Reposting spam.
These usually take the form of “Omigosh!! I totally just scored free tickets/iPods/iPads/whatever!!” If you tend to be a sucker for this crap, repeat the following mantra 489,293 times: “Companies don’t give hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of stuff away for free. Ever.” This is just not a solid business practice. If you click on the link – you don’t even have to share it! – you get a lovely little virus that spams all of your Facebook friends, some of whom are also suckers and will click on the link. And so the crap goes on and on. Stop clicking and this kind of spamming will stop.
3. Posting eleventy billion pictures if you’re just a regular facebooker, as in not a page owner.
Page owners get a little more freedom here, because if a fan gets annoyed with the excessive amount of content, they can unlike the page. That’s trickier when it’s just a regular friend doing it. The only real option to not see such excessive postings is to hide or unfriend the person, and you might want to see the very occasional but real, meaningful post that occurs. If you’re a chronic picture poster/sharer, get your own page or use pinterest for such purposes.
|Old school Instagram|
4. Posting pictures of food.
Yes, if you read the first post about what to stop doing on Facebook, you realize that this point appeared there as well. I think it bears repeating. I might even devote a whole future post to it. The thing is, people still do this. All. The. Effing. Time. I’m willing to bet that 99% of Facebook users don’t give a rat’s ass about what someone’s food looks like. It’s food. Everyone eats it. The vast majority of food just doesn’t look that interesting unless one is about to eat it, and if they are looking at a picture of it, I’m betting that it’s highly unlikely that they just happen to be eating the exact same food. So stop taking pictures of it.
P.S. – I searched “instagram food” on Pinterest to find a joke about it, like the one I added here. What I found there was about a million real pictures of food. Dear God, make it stop.
I hope you feel highly educated in the ways of Facebook now. Go forth, and further the knowledge yourself. Or continue to be annoyed. It’s your call.