Confession: I am on Facebook a lot. I was hooked pretty much from the moment I joined. At first, I loved connecting with all the friends from the various circles of my life and watching them all interact around a single topic. Then, I got into the games (which was mostly short-lived). Now, I use it to stay caught up with my friends and to update my blog page. Since I use it a lot, I see a lot of stupid crap that needs to stop before I stab someone in the armpit with a chopstick. These are just a few examples.
1.) Like this status/post if you’re against cancer/racism/hate/puppy hitting.
At best, they are ridiculous wastes of space. At worst, they are manipulative ploys to get more “likes”. I never like these because I’m not a fan of being manipulated, and the implication is that by not liking it, you are in favor of cancer/racism/hate/puppy hitting, which obviously is not the case. Wanna get more likes? Post something like-worthy.
2.) This baby is dying and needs more likes so the doctors can save him!!
This is another manipulative ploy for likes. Do you really think there is a doctor out there waiting for likes? Seriously? Again – post something worthy of likes, and you’ll get more likes.
3.) Posting vague status updates that require more information or are obvious ploys for attention.
I don’t see much of these anymore because I’ve hidden the guilty parties. If you have some drama that needs worked out, call your bestie. Don’t put it on Facebook and then refuse to talk about it.
4.) Liking something inanimate or with no association to anything.
When you like something on Facebook, it’s supposed to be something you want to know more about. Want to know when your favorite restaurant is having a special? Like their Facebook page and be updated. I don’t think the cold side of your pillow, chocolate chip cookies, or God will be updating you on anything, at least not via Facebook posts.
5.) Accusing someone of not loving Jesus (or their mother, or penguins, or whatever) because they didn’t share some stupid post. This is more manipulation. There’s nothing in the Bible about Facebook. You won’t go to hell. Your mother and the penguins will still love you. I promise.
6.) Posting pictures of food. Confession: I have done this, but only if the food is really picture-worthy, like the time I botched the chocolate cakes. There are people who think their friends want to see every salad, soup, and sushi roll they eat. Newsflash: they don’t.7.) Sending game requests repeatedly to the same friends.
One game request is fine. Two can even be forgiven. More than that, and you can safely assume that your friend doesn’t want to play your game, and you are officially annoying them.
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| The Farmville and Cityville books are 200 pages of the sentence “Send requests to your Facebook friends an infinite number of times until they grow sick of you and unfriend you” written over and over again. |
Facebook can be a great place to reconnect, share experiences, or even network for a job. Let’s keep the good stuff on there and lose the manipulative crap.
Allison Maruska 
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