My Husband Interviews Himself

We’ve all experienced people who do it. Letterman even picked on a guy for doing it.

The self-interviewers.

These are the people who ask and answer their own questions. For example:
“Was I worried about the roads during the storm? Of course I was.”
” How much would I pay for gas? I’d say no more than $5 a gallon.”
“Is there a reason someone must interview themselves? I’m sure there must be.”

I’ve started noticing everyone who does this, and one of the worst offenders is my husband. There is no faster way for my teeth to clench and my skin to crawl. He does it mostly when talking with a friend and trying to make a point. And he usually does two or three questions/answers in a row.

“Why did I install sprinklers in the garden? We hope to get larger vegetables with more regular watering.”
“Did I attach it to the main sprinkler line? Yes, I did.”
“Is there a better way to do it? Perhaps I could irritate the sprinklers by interviewing myself and they would run over and attach themselves to get away.”

Gaaaaah!! There’s someone else in the conversation! Answer their questions! I’m sure they have good ones!

So in conclusion, if you’re not a self-interviewer, you will now be keenly aware of those who are. You’re welcome. And if you are a self-interviewer, STOP IT!

Can you relate? I’m sure you can.

3 thoughts on “My Husband Interviews Himself

  1. That’s funny. I can’t imagine somebody doing that all the time. Occasionally I’ll do it in a conversation (or argument) if I’m trying to make a point that the other person isn’t going to bring up, like: You asked me to pick weeds with you. Was it hot as hell? Yes. Did I complain? No. Then YOU took a break after five minutes and never came back outside, but I finished doing the whole garden anyway…

    That sort of thing. (The answer is always “I got a phone call and then I forgot…” Translation: “I don’t like picking weds.”)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: So You Call Yourself A Writer? | Allison Maruska

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